Can’t focus over here

As I sit down to write a beautiful, thought-provoking, and inspiring fall farm themed post…I can’t.

My mind keeps coming back to DIVORCE…gut wrenching, home wrecking divorce. Sadly, it is what is on my mind. So bear with me, I need to mull this all over.

Someone close to us is drowning in it right now and I have no idea how to help. I want to take over the burden for even just a day if it would help. I have said everything I can possibly imagine in hopes that it would ease this mess but to be honest, I don’t know if it helped at all.

When you have a front seat to the scene of a family falling apart, you can’t help but think of your own. I am not wearing those shoes but I am always petrified of the remote possibility. Marriages fail all the time; plain and simple. Some should and some shouldn’t. Not my place to judge but what really keeps the ones that survive, going day after day?

I know that every marriage book and mommy blog has probably weighed in on this issue with their own take on their marriage. I think the key there is that is works for them in their marriage. For me, the key to making this work is just doing it day in a day out. Making the adjustments as we go to fit where we are each day. That may sound simplistic and downright lame. But that is really how I view all of this. Granted, a date night and making the relationship a priority is bound to help. Most days it feels like a juggling act that we are doing by the seat of our pants. I will probably look back at this post when we have been married twenty years and laugh at myself. If only, my much older and wiser self of the future could write this young’n a little note to reassure. If only…..

Just the mention of divorce causes a drastically different reaction from me now that we have children in the house. Not going to sleep at night with both parents under the same roof each night must rock a kid’s world. I can’t even wrap my mind around how every cell in their little bodies is impacted. It breaks my heart.

When divorce hits so close to home it makes me want to baton down the hatches and direct the focus homeward and count our blessings.

So around the casa these days, in our utterly imperfect marriage, we are going to make more of a point to enjoy the tiny things like putting kids to bed together in the evening, doing dishes as a family, and taking our evening walks at sunset.

I can’t provide the immediate relief that I want to for our loved ones but we can love them and ride out this storm with them.

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